Dear Infertility, Thank you.

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Dear Infertility,

I hated you.

You steal dreams. You break hearts. You bring grief.  You consume lives.  You are the reason I couldn’t get pregnant on my own.  You drowned my heart in deep misery from the inability to become a Mother how most women do.  You told me that my body wasn’t good enough.  You may have been a huge part of my story, but you never defined me. And on this day, two years ago, I kicked your ass. I defeated you. I showed you that there is victory in infertility and God finally planted life in my womb.

Infertility, there are so many things you brought with you when you entered my life.  It wasn’t just that I couldn’t get pregnant.  You brought me more tears than I ever thought I could shed.  Because of you I laid on my bathroom floor in complete emptiness after countless negative pregnancy tests time and time again.  I had to endure shots, bruises, and all kinds of meds because when you are infertile and you seek fertility treatment for help, that is what you are in for.  You are expensive and exhausting physically, emotionally, and mentally.  Infertility, you drowned my heart in disappointment and agony.  And truthfully, it was pretty painful every time I heard the words “I’m pregnant” from someone other than myself.   And yet, in the midst of all of that-you brought me hope.

As much as I hated you, Infertility, I am also so thankful that you were my story.  You made me strong. Even before I got pregnant, my strength was rising. Not only did I feel like Superwoman after all of those injections, meds, blood draws, doctor visits, etc. but I found strength emotionally, as well. I learned how to be brave and walk our story with faith trusting that God knew every single detail better than I did. I learned how to be courageous as my husband gave me a progesterone shot that hurt like you wouldn’t believe every single night for 2 months so I could get and stay pregnant. Infertility, you taught me that I am never alone in my darkest days. Never did I imagine I would be labeled as infertile. Nor did I imagine that we would seek fertility treatment. However, infertility, it is because of you that I get to be a Mom to Charlize, Sawyer, and Jax. This love that I get to experience with them is absolutely undeniable. It is the greatest feeling in the world and if you weren’t apart of my story, I would be missing out on a truly honorable role as their Mommy. It is because of you that two years ago I found myself lying on a Doctors bed waiting for two precious and perfectly made embryos to be transferred to my womb. Infertility, God used you in in my life to make a platform for my story and reach the hearts of people walking the same pain I was in.  And it is because of you that I have a greater understanding of what hope really is.

Infertility, I don’t hate you, not anymore. God makes beauty out of ashes.  You were my ashes, but God made you beautiful.  If it wasn’t for you-for the extreme heartache you caused me, the lies you told me, the grief you brought my heart over and over again- not only would I not be a Mom to my darling hope triplets, but I can now truly grasp on to how powerful and remarkable it means to have hope in Jesus Christ.  Hope anchors the soul. Hope does not disappoint. Hope is having faith for what seems impossible.  It is trusting God when it feels hopeless. My journey to parenthood was nothing short of hope.  God had every single detail orchestrated from the second He planted the seed of Motherhood in my heart.  Infertility, today, when I really reflect on those years when you were apart of my life, I can only say, Thank you.

Sincerely,

Mama of Hope

@thefortintrio

The Fortin Trio

 

 

 

 

“Freshly Picked”Lemonde homemade by The Fortin Trio

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We are so so excited to share that we are collaborating with the amazing Freshly Picked!!! They have the most incredible Baby Moccs and are truly the first shoes our almost 11 month old triplets actually wear and keep on their feet!! Not only are these shoes made incredibly well, something I love about them is that they are made with leather. They are perfect for babies because they are not hard soles, but are comfortable and still offer a lot of protection to the babies feet. We are even more excited to announce that we will be doing a GIVEAWAY on our instagram:  Our Instagram Account:@thefortintrio in a couple weeks so keep your eyes peeled as you may be the lucky winner of a pair of new Freshly Picked moccs!!

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Charlize is wearing the “pink lemonade” moccs. They are absolutely darling and fit perfectly.

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Jax and Sawyer are sporting the “ants” moccs and as you can tell they were all smiles in this adorable collection.

This might be one of my favorite photo shoots this far. The babies were having a ball and I loved capturing all their sweet joyful smiles in their darling moccs!!!

Get your “Freshly Picked” Lemonade homemade by The Fortin Trio

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Dear Mama with the Barren Womb

Dear Mama with the Barren Womb,

This Mother’s Day, I celebrate YOU.

I know this is a hard day. I know you are dreading it. I know it can be agonizing and painful. I know your heart hurts–it hurts on a lot of days, but on this day, it especially hurts. I know this day is just a reminder that your womb is barren and longing to be fruitful. Trust me, I know.  I know that Mom’s every where are celebrated and you’re desperate to relish in a role so special and honorary as Mother. I know you long to see your little one’s face and look her in the eye with love bursting through your seams, because it is by far the greatest feeling you could have ever imagined.

Mama, this Mother’s Day I celebrate YOU. I celebrate you because you are strong and brave. I celebrate you for not losing hope. I celebrate you because you are a Mama and we are just waiting on the Lord to work out every little detail. I celebrate you because fertility treatment sucks and those bruises on your bottom from daily progesterone shots remind you that your womb is not full.  I know you are exhausted emotionally and physically. Mama, I know.

Mama, I celebrate you because the scar on your tummy represents someone  who you didn’t get to snuggle with for very long before he was welcomed into Heaven’s gates sooner than what you imagined. I know you’re grieving, Mama.  I celebrate you because it takes a lot of bravery and a lot of strength to bury your baby.  My heart breaks for your loss, Mama.

Mama, I celebrate you because your baby left your womb far too early in pregnancy. I know you were dreaming of her and planning the nursery and every little detail of life as a Mommy. And Mama, on that day when you lost your baby, I know it was heart wrenching-the ugly cry kind of heart wrenching.

Mama, I celebrate you because you take in kids that need a home until they find their forever home. I celebrate you because being a foster parent is not an easy job.

Mama, I am sorry the adoption process is taking forever and that it is such an emotional roller coaster.  I celebrate you because you are patient and adoptions takes a special kind of Mother’s heart.

Mama, I celebrate you because even though you haven’t actually given birth you are a Mom to many. You have a Mother’s heart and although your body didn’t stretch as a baby grew inside, you are still a Mama.

Mama, today on this Mother’s Day, I celebrate you! I know it is a hard day.  And on this day I remember and celebrate you. I send my love and prayers your way.  It is okay to cry, Mama, because you are not alone and all though it is sometimes hard for us to fully understand the Lord in all His ways, I trust in the details of the story He has made for you.  I celebrate who you are. You are inspiring, strong, beautiful, and full of bravery.  You are a Mama and this Mother’s Day, I celebrate you!

Sincerely,

I once was you. untitled-18

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Family Photo Overload

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We had so much fun during our family photo shoot. I know there are some things I would have changed but that is the photographer in me. My Mom took the photos with us–I literally gave her my camera put on auto and went for it. I am so happy with them and overjoyed to have some updated family pictures!! Everyone was amazing. I think my babies are little models…literally!!! Enjoy the photos!!

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The babies are adjusting okay to their new schedule. We took the 4am feeding away from them last week and they still wake up continually needing to be soothed. Ryan and I do not pick them up out of their crib, which usually works but is tiring. The last two nights all three babies have woken up around 5 crying…and crying some more. Our day doesn’t usually start until 7am. So it is a work in progress.

We also got them on a new day time schedule. They are having 2 naps a day now. The morning nap is from about 9:20-11am and the afternoon I am hoping for at least an hour and a half, but the last several days it has been maybe an hour nap. I know they need to nap longer because they are so OVERTIRED and can barely make it through the rest of the evening without fuss galore, so the second day time nap is a work in progress!!

Charlize is adjusting well to her helmet. Although she hates wearing it, we are seeing progress. She definitely slept better when she wasn’t wearing it! We have about 8 more weeks to go.untitled-5

Jax is teething like crazzzy!!! He is my jolly chunkster!! I have three really happy babies, but this stud is always happy. He and Charlize, however, are struggling a lot with those teeth coming in. Poor babies. untitled-14

Sawyer is doing so good!! He is great at eating food with his hands–not everything makes it into his mouth, but he is on a roll. He is the most successful sleeper so far. They are my gerber babies!! So much cuteness!!untitled-16

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Buckle Up!!!

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The trio have had quite a fussy week!!! The boys are teething like wild and Charlize is adjusting to her helmet (she had it off for a few days while it was painted so she is getting used to it all over again). They also seem to be getting ready for some nap transitions!!! eeeekkk….buckle up Mommy!!!

The babies usually nap 3 times a day: 2 morning cat naps (45min-hour) and 1 afternoon 2 hour (ish) nap. Last week there has been consistency in changes in the afternoon nap. All three babies are barely napping an hour. So, this means they are probably ready to go down to 2 naps?!?! RIGHT? I mean I think they probably are!

Next week is going to be a WILD ride because!!! Praying it will be a smooth transition!!!

Goodbye Gerd!!!

The babies are also drinking 6oz bottles!! Do you  know how HUGE this is?!?! GOODBYE GERD!!! #ohmygerd  We are so excited that gerd has finally left this household. Glory to Jesus!!! We are so thankful to see the babies drinking more milk!! They are doing so well at not spitting up too. This is such a huge answer to prayer. We still need to burp them often, but we have been waiting a LONG time for these days. We will be taking away their 4am feeding tonight. Buckle up AGAIN!!!!

Charlize and Diva Crown!

Charlize is wearing a helmet. She has had it for about two weeks now. It has been a bit of struggle mostly only at nights and when it has been really warm, but she is doing a lot better now. Auntie Val painted it and it is adorable. We had a Doctor’s appointment this week and they are already seeing progress in the reshaping of her head!! wahoo!!!

Dedication!

Babies were dedicated today!!! I can’t even handle it!!! It was so beautiful!! Check out our Youtube Video that captures the dedication!!

 

Photo shoot of the week!! 

If you look up top we will be sharing a photo every week from  our weekly shoots!! Check out what we did this week!!!

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Can’t wait to share more on how much fun we have this week!!! Thanks for following our journey!!!

Bringing Disney to the Fortin Trio

This is the happiest place on EARTH!!! Loving our babies to pieces!!!

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Naturally, we dressed Jax up as Goofy because it fits his personality.

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Sawyer couldn’t have been happier being Mickey!

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And our very own Diva Girl, was Minnie!

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This shoot was truly too cute and the babies LOVED it!! So much joy in these photos!!

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Apparently, he was talking to much!!! untitled-17untitled-18

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My Little Bunnies

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For this weeks photo shoot I dressed my little trio up as bunnies and OMG it just is TOO MUCH!!! This might be might favorite photo shoot yet. My little bunnies are just ADORABLE!!! I would love to get more creative with their shoots, so if you have a fun theme idea please send my way. We have talked about Mario Brothers and the Princess, Wizard of Oz…there are tons!! Super hero!!! I am so happy I am doing weekly photo shoots of them  and I think it is something I will really treasure. I only wish I started doing it when they were much younger.

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Charlize–my adorable little bunny..was of course the PERFECT MODEL so she has three times as many photos than the boys.

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Jax-My JOY baby!!! This little guy is quite literally full of so many smiles. He typically is the last one to fall asleep as he plays around in his crib and laughs even in his sleep. It is too cute!!untitled-26

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Sawyer is my little bundle of personality. He has so much to say already!!! He is a flirt and I can’t handle the joy bursting through his photos!!

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Twinning!!! These two, while they both are so unique in their ways they carry so many similar qualities!!!

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It has been an interesting week.

The babies have three naps a day, two in the morning and one longer one in the afternoon. The last week or two they starting showing some signs that maybe they were ready to lose one of the morning naps. So, this week we went for it–transition to one morning nap. And…drum roll…It has been a NIGHTMARE!!!! Either these babies are not ready or something is off with the timing. I think they are not quite ready, but that’s what being a parent is all about: TRIAL AND ERROR. So it has taken all week to try something new and get them back to their normal routine. Ayayayaya

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They are absolutely LOVING their cribs and it is pretty much the cutest ever seeing them all snuggled dreaming away. The boys seem to enjoy side sleeping while Charlize is all sprawled out.  I am working on increasing some of their milk feedings during the day.  While I feel like the GERD has pretty much gone away, they do still struggle with some reflux and need to be burped often. Lately the solids have been causing some tummy issues. The babies have always had tummy issues, but they seem to have gotten worse with the solids. They are very sensitive like their Daddy. So we are keeping an eye on watch solids make things worse and going from there. They definitely enjoy eating, that’s for sure!!!

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We had a visit from our little friend, Aria. She is 10 days younger than the trio and they are the best of friends. It was so much fun doing an Easter shoot together!!

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The babies are in such a fun stage and I love seeing them learn new things. They are loving all of their new toys. It is adorable. Charlize is loving the sound of her voice and LOVES sitting up. Sawyer is our bouncer. He will jump in his jumper and in your arms. And Jax rolls and rolls and rolls. they are all really happy babies, but I think Jax carries a little extra smiles with him. They are becoming more and more aware of each other, which is adorable–touching and playing with one another!! I can’t even handle all the cuteness!!!

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This video is hilarious. Jax is really obsessed with Sawyer’s face!!

I have the happiest babies ever!!! They are just darling and I am so proud to be their Mommy!!! Happy Easter to you all and thank you for LOVING on our family. God has so richly blessed us!!!

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